July 11, 2018
4:07 pm
I think I have internalized the word “selfish”
How will I know for sure?
I think I abuse substances:
laxatives – to cope with deep seated feelings of self worthlessness
benadryl – to cope with insomnia
alcohol – when sad, with friends, to feel less anxious
smoking – when I’m in pain, to think and to enjoy thinking, to become more aware of myself and to question reality
Why do I want to believe I’m a bad person?
When I finally admitted to myself that I struggle with substance use, I started to question if things were deeper and darker than I thought.
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